Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Virgin Mary or Me?


I'm sorry everyone, but it's not what you think. Let me explain, it was a late night on Chicago's Westside and I was a little bit tipsy from my friend Jody's party. It was about 2 a.m and we couldn't get a taxi so we decided to walk back to the hotel.

Now usually, I'm a big boy and I can hold in what I drink, but it was something different about that night. The cool Chicago air seemed to rest and I was drawn into a melancholy daze over the rhythmatic sounds of the sirens that reverberated of of my ear drums like ping pong balls. As if a human of its own, it yelled and screamed to let it loose. It beat up my stomach and i could hold no longer. It banged and banged until I obliged.

I didn't want to just piss on someone's lawn or in the alley and be snatched up by a homeless guy, so the underpass was my only option. I slowly unzipped my baggy 36x34 Old Navy boot cut jeans and whipped out Willy and I did my thing. No one was around but Ashley and Steve and they treated the incident with as mouch thought as blinking an eye. We went on and I stumbled into the street enough to feel the friction of a 94' Thunderbird. To us, that was the end of the story, another day in the life of an urban rebel. I didn't expect hundreds of people to
flock to it and proclaim it the Virgin Mary.

Taken from The Young Liberals.

2 comments:

Enlightenment said...

I'm sitting here trying to keep my cookies from coming up and trying to read your post and I can hardly stop laughing. I had chemo yesterday and to say that I feel like shit is an understatement. But when I read your post I cracked up. Nearly brought up the little lunch that I could force down, but I still completely lost it. Right wing religionists seem to have been born stupid and have been losing ground ever since. Wasn't it just a few months that we were finding images of the Virgin Mary on everything from hamburgers, to pizzas, to bricks of cheese? You don't think there's a patter here do you? Maybe we should stop looking for signs from Heaven in Churches and concentrate on the nearest Wendy's of KFC.

Yeah.

bschneider5 said...

I thought you might be interested in possibly being a contributor to a blog called www.youdecide2008.blogspot.com It is geared towards the 2008 Presidential election. Let me know what you think!