Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Virgin Mary or Me?

I'm sorry everyone, but it's not what you think. Let me explain, it was a late night on Chicago's Westside and I was a little bit tipsy from my friend Jody's party. It was about 2 a.m and we couldn't get a taxi so we decided to walk back to the hotel.

Now usually, I'm a big boy and I can hold in what I drink, but it was something different about that night. The cool Chicago air seemed to rest and I was drawn into a melancholy daze over the rhythmatic sounds of the sirens that reverberated of of my ear drums like ping pong balls. As if a human of its own, it yelled and screamed to let it loose. It beat up my stomach and i could hold no longer. It banged and banged until I obliged.

I didn't want to just piss on someone's lawn or in the alley and be snatched up by a homeless guy, so the underpass was my only option. I slowly unzipped my baggy 36x34 Old Navy boot cut jeans and whipped out Willy and I did my thing. No one was around but Ashley and Steve and they treated the incident with as mouch thought as blinking an eye. We went on and I stumbled into the street enough to feel the friction of a 94' Thunderbird. To us, that was the end of the story, another day in the life of an urban rebel. I didn't expect hundreds of people to
flock to it and proclaim it the Virgin Mary.

Taken from The Young Liberals.


Enlightenment said...

I'm sitting here trying to keep my cookies from coming up and trying to read your post and I can hardly stop laughing. I had chemo yesterday and to say that I feel like shit is an understatement. But when I read your post I cracked up. Nearly brought up the little lunch that I could force down, but I still completely lost it. Right wing religionists seem to have been born stupid and have been losing ground ever since. Wasn't it just a few months that we were finding images of the Virgin Mary on everything from hamburgers, to pizzas, to bricks of cheese? You don't think there's a patter here do you? Maybe we should stop looking for signs from Heaven in Churches and concentrate on the nearest Wendy's of KFC.


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