Thursday, May 18, 2006


By Brandon Enlightenment, and Daniel G.
Edited by Advocate 1
Why is The "Holy" Bible considered a good book? As our friends Ragnarok and Beast have already pointed out, the violence and sexual perversion which God alternately condemns and then condones is anything but inspirational, unless you read it as a psychological text in which the Lord God represents a raving, cold blooded psychopath who changes his mind at the drop of the hat.. If a human being were to behave the way God behaves in the the Holy Bible, we'd put him on trial for crimes against humanity, find him guilty, and hang him in the public square. And while we can't execute a being who does not exist, we can certainly do our best to spread the truth--to explain that the being which is described in the great monotheistic texts is not a being worthy of worship and adulation, but rather, a sick, demented psychopath who is no better than the pretend devil that he is supposedly fighting.

Allow us to be perfectly clear on this matter. As far as we're concerned, the Lord God, and to a lesser degree, his only begotten son and chosen prophets are not proper role models. They are sick, twisted figures created by sick, twisted people with sick, twisted priorities and sexual fantasies. Instead of referring to this bizarre collection of make believe beings and mortal followers as holy or inspirational, we should recognize them as the dangers to society that they really are.

As if they could have been anything else.

In Deuteronomy 21:18-21, the lord God tells us to execute unruly children. In Numbers 15:32-36 he goes so far as to kill 42 children because they ridiculed one of his favorite mouthpieces:

"(The prophet Elisha) went up to Bethel and as he was going up by the way there came forth little children out of the city and mocked him and said unto him, 'Go up thou bald head, go up thou bald head,' And he turned and looked on them and cursed them in the name of the Lord. And there came forth two she bears put of the wood and tore forty and two of them"

Nor is this the only time that the Lord God behaves more like a serial killer than a loving, eternal father. In Numbers 15:32-36 The Lord God comes off as an anal retentive thug who murders otherwise innocent human beings over the most trifling of mistakes:

"And while the children of Israel were in the wilderness, the found a man that gathered sticks upon the sabbath day. And they that found him brought him unto Aaron and all the congregation. And they put him in ward because it was not declared what should be done to him. And the Lord said unto Moses 'The man shall surely be put to death; all the congregation shall stone him with stones without the Camp.' And the congregation brought him out of the camp and stoned him with stones and he died as the Lord commanded Moses."

Translated into modern English, the Lord God had a shit hemorrhage because someone chose to pick up a bunch of spindly old sticks on the wrong day of the week. Yup, real compassion there.

In one chapter he tells mankind not to murder, but in another chapter he's telling the Israelis to wage war crimes against their neighbors (the Midianites in the Book of Numbers ). In Leviticus, he hands down the laws which will govern slavery. In Genesis Chapters 1 and 2 he creates a situation in which incest is the only means by which the world can be populated, but then, only a few pages later, he decides that incest wasn't such a hot idea to begin with and decides that it is sinful. Not to mention genetically destructive. This of course, means that God isn't only a little ambiguous when it comes to sexual morality; it also means that the Divine Father can't make ups his mind, that his purported morality is a classic example of the moral relevance that his fundamentalists followers (how I want to say nut cakes) so obsessively condemn while practicing the concept themselves.

And then there's the issue of homosexuality. In Genesis God supposedly destroys two cities because of that particular sin, but only a few books later, in I Samuel 18: 1-4, we find the very unusual relationship between Jonathan and David, who, if they were alive today, would have joint checking accounts, and might be campaigning for gay marriage:

"And it came to pass, when David finished speaking with Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Saul took David in that day, and wouldn't let him go back home. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because Jonathan loved David as his own soul. And Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that was upon him, and gave it to David, and his garments, even to his sword, and to his bow, and to his girdle." (1 Samuel 18:1-4). Paging forward to 1 Samuel 20: 30-31 we learn that "Saul's anger flared up against Jonathan, and Saul said to him, 'You son of a perverse and rebellious woman, don't you know that I know that you have chosen the son of Jesse to your own confusion and unto the confusion of your mother's nakedness? For as long as the son of Jesse remains alive, you won't be established, nor your kingdom. So now, send for him and have him brought here to me, because he is going to die .'" You don't need to be a rocket scientist to know that King Saul has just accused his son of having an affair with this guy named David, who by the way is described in 1 Samuel 16:12 as "ruddy with a beautiful face, and entirely handsome to look at." It leaves you asking the obvious question. Why would the Lord God destroy two cities because of homosexuality, but then cast a loving eye on young David who was clearly having an affair with the king's son? Don't ask the Lord God, because it seems as if he doesn't even know.

On other occasions the Lord God openly endorses the idea of religiously-inspired murder. In Judges 11:30-40 God accepts Jephthah's daughter as a human sacrifice. In Leviticus 27: 28-29 The Lord God orders "devoted" humans to be put to death, saying: " No devoted thing, both of man and beast shall be sold or redeemed, but shall surely be put to death."

Sadly, the proverbial apple doesn't fall to far from the tree. Never mind the fact that Jesus, "God's" only begotten son was the illegitimate child of a careless teenager named Mary and a middle aged man named Joseph, the fact of the matter is that even Jesus, the so-called Prince of Peace is little more than a supercilious little brat with a mercurial temper and a penchant for breaking his Father's own commandments. *

In Leviticus 11-47; Deuteronomy 14:6-10, God the Father bans the consumption of pork, rabbit, and shellfish. But, in the New Testament Jesus liberalized the dietary code. In the Old Testament, there are specific methods by which a couple in get a divorce. In the New testament Jesus cracks down on divorce. The Ten Commands tell us that mankind should not steal, but in Luke 19: 29-34 we learn that Jesus "sent two of his disciples, saying go ye into the shall find a colt tied whereon yet never man sat. Loose him and bring him hither. And if any man ask you, why do you loose him, this shall ye say to him 'because the Lord hath need of him...and as they were loosing the colt the owners thereof said unto him, 'Why loose ye the colt?' And they said, 'The Lord hath need of him.'"

In the Old Testament, God the father told us to honor our fathers and mothers. That isn't what Jesus tells us. In Luke 14:26 he says: "If any man come to me and hate not his father and mother, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple ." The same sentiment is echoed in Matthew 10:35-36 when the Son says: "For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and a man's foes shall be they of his own household." So much for family values. But then again, you also have to remember that Jesus was a sad faced, long-haired prophet who wept easily and who hung around with twelve guys who had left their wives and families to follow him. That isn't to say anything happened, but by the same standard, the circumstances seem a tad suspicious.

And to make it all the worse, according to the Book of Revelations only 144,000 people are going to go to Heaven anyhow. The countless billions of people who lived before Christ was born are going to hell because they chose the wrong time and place to be born. (Proving once again that it pays to choose your parents carefully before you are conceived so as to avoid being raised in the wrong religion). And then you have the countless billions of people who were born after the purported Resurrection who may have lived honorable, moral lives, but who dared to call the Lord God and his persnickety son by the wrong names.

The Bible is not a good book. Aside from a few glimmers of love and forgiveness, it is a violent book created in a bigoted, repressive time, by bigoted, repressive people, and the fact that so many people in the 21st can still admire and emulate the writers of such a repugnant collection of horrors only tells us that there are lot of bigoted, repressive people in the 21st Century.

*As Katie, another team member has pointed out, God the Father broke his own prohibition against knowing an unmarried virgin when he impregnated the "Virgin" Mary. Of course, the idea of Human-Divine hybrids had been commonplace in the Pagan world, and since the Israelis were under Roman domination at the time it is safe to assume that Joseph and Mary might have heard about Greek-Roman myths in which Gods copulated with mere mortals.


Ragnarok said...

Did you know the sin of Sodom and Gomorragh wasn't anything to do with homosexuality? The original hebrew has no mention of homosexuality. Ya,da´ is a hebrew verb, meaning 'to know'. it's meaning is ambiguous, it shows up 943 times in Hebrew scriptures, usually it means, 'to know a fact'.

So "Where are the men
that came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them." {GEN 19:5} takes on a whole different meaning.

Much confusion over who
was gathered around Lot's house comes from the phrase in the original Hebrew that is
translated from "anshei ha'ir, anshei S'dom." This phrase can mean either, men of the city,
or Sodom, or people of Sodom. Homo-haters chose the former interpretation for the sake of
proving their point. After all, you don't take the wife and kiddies to an angel raping party.

Enlightenment said...

As a matter of fact, I had heard that, but the Christian RIght doesn't want to hear the truth. When in doubt they almost invariably go for the explanation which is the most harmful and superstitious. Then again it may just be that Sodom and Gomorragh were the victims of natural disatsers which anicent, ignortant people were only more than happy to blame on the people they loved to hate the most. Good point, Ragnarok.