YELLOW RIBBONS, UNITED WE STAND, and OTHER ORWELLIAN BULLSHIT

Editor's note

I'd really like to take credit for this, but it was written by my half brother, Brian, who is another half brother to Brandon. For those of you who are confused about the family relationships here, all I can say is "welcome to the club." Brian, Brandon, and I are half brothers by the same birth mother. Danny, on the other hand is my half brother by my biological father, although he is not related to Brian and Brandon. Easy, right?

Oh well, Brandon will be back on the 24th and should be getting into the swim of things again by Monday. Until then, I hope you enjoy what Brian has to offer.

Kyle Kilpatrick


YELLOW RIBBONS, UNITED WE STAND, AND OTHER ORWELLIAN BULLSHIT

By Brian Sinclaire


I wish someone would define what they mean when they say "we support out troops." Maybe it's me, but when I think about supporting the troops I think about keeping them safe, not putting them in harm's way. In other words, I would support the troops by not sending them to a war of choice in the first place. I guess you might say that I support the troops so much that want to bring them home as safely and as soon as possible. Of course, I'm probably the only person on my block who understands that "support the troops" means we are supposed to "suuport the war." Or, rather, "We support Bush and his unnecessary aggression of choice."

If the phrase "we support the troops," is a study in Orwellian doublespeak, the medium by which it is conveyed (bright yellow ribbons) is nothing less than an underhanded insult. I don't think too many people realize that yellow ribbons are a direct steal from the 1973 hit by Tony Orlando and Dawn, "Tie A Yellow Ribbon Around The Old Oak Tree." For those of you who are unfamiliar with this little tune, it is sung in the first person present and the person who is telling the story is not a veteran nor a former prisoner of war. He is a former inmate who has just been released from prison.

The lyrics couldn't be more clear about this:

"I'm comin' home I've done my time,"

This is followed, a few seconds later, by:

"I'm really still in prison and my love she holds the key..."

In other words, the pathetic indiviuduals who are displaying the yellow ribbons and (worse yet) magnetic yelow ribbon plaques on their cars are actually comparing the troops to former criminals. Now isn't that a fine way to show your patriotism for American soldiers? But then again, who said that Republicans are in any way selective when they advocate style over substance?But it doesn't end there, Some of those magnetic yellow ribbons, the ones enblasonned with the words "we support our troops," aren't even made in the United States! They're made in the People's Republic Of China, a world/super power wannabe, which is both, a growing security and economic threat to to the United States of America! You remember the People's Republic of China, don't you? You should. God knows enough American corporations are showing their "patriotism" by shipping American jobs over there.

Almost as bad as the yellow ribbons are the red, white, and blue "United We Stand" stickers that have been popping up in car and house windows."United We Stand." Now, what, exactly does that mean? I suppose that if it means we are all Americans, and that we live under the same laws and the same Constitution that it's probably a good thing. But that isn't what the war hawks have in mind. Far from it. "United We Stand" is nothing more than Orwellian Doublespeak for " we support the war criminal president who invaded Iraq in the first place." Or, if you prefer, "one people, one nation, one president." Which, when translated into the orginal German goes something like: "Ein volk, ein Reich, ein Fuhrer!"

You really have to give the Biush regime credit. Not only has it waged an illegitimate war in Iraq, it has also declared a war of choice on the English language.