DONALD RUM'FELD'S LOONY STRIKE FORCE BAND!
Based on "Sergeant Pepper"s Lonely Hearts Club Band"
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney.
New lyrics by Jeff and Brandon
It was 30 months ago tonight
Donald Rummy sent the boys to fight
And he says he's never gonna be foiled
But we know it's all about the oil
So may we introduce to you
The lies you've known for all these years!
Donald Rum'feld's Loony Strike Force Band!
They're Donald Rum'felds Loony Strike Force Band
They hope you will enjoy his war
They're Donald Rum'feld's loony Strike Force Band
They're laughing as they go too far!
Donald Rum'feld's Loony
Donald Rum'feld's Loony
Donald Rum'feld's Loony Strike Force Band
It's horrible to be there
They sure do love to kill
We're such a trusting foolish bunch
They want a brand now power bass
They want to stay in power!
They don't really wanna stop the war!
And they're never gonna stop the gore!
So people go along for now
No one's ever gonna ask him how
So let us introduce to you
The lies we've known for all these years
Donald Rum'feld's Loony Strike Force Band!
WITH A TOM DELAY FROM MY FRIENDS
To be sung to the tune of "With a Little Help From My Friends,"
by John Lennon and Paul McCartney.
New lyrics by Jeff and Brandon
What would you do if I told a damned lie?
Would you stand up and walk out on me?
What would you do if I salted the votes?
Would you change the old rules to help me?
I get off with a Tom Delay from my friends
I get off with a couple lies from my friends
I'll play golf with a little help from my friends
What would you do if I redrew the lines
Does it worry you to think I'd win?
How do you feel when I toss out the rules?
Will the court still try and stick its nose in?
No I get off with a Tom Delay from my friends
I get off with a couple lies from my friends
Going to bribe with a little help from my friends
Did I fool anybody?
Enough to Speak for the House
I deceive everybody!
They'll never know I'm a louse
Would you believe I'm a really nice guy
If I handed you a couple of thou?
What would you do if I threatened a judge?
Would you bother to ask why and how?
Oh I get off with a Delay from my friends!
Oh I get off with a couple lies from my friends!
Going to bribe with a little help from my friends
I don't need anybody!
The Congress can go straight to hell
I'm above everybody
I'll get a new lie to sell
Oh I get off with a Delay from my friends
Oh I get off with a couple lies from my friends
Going to bribe with a little help from my friends
Oh get off with a little help from my friends
With a Delay from my friends!
KEEPING YOU ALIVE FOR NOTHING
Based on "Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds"
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New lyrics by Jeff and Brandon
Picture yourself on a hospital daybed
A tube in your side, your E.E.G . flat
Suddenly someone is there his morals
A Neocon says, "You can't die just yet."
Monitors beeping, machines pump your blood,
Oxygen goes to your head
Your body is living,your brain is done in
You're not gone
CHORUS
Keeping you alive to suffer!
Keeping you alive for nothing!
Keeping you alive for ever
Ohhhh ohhhhh
Instruments prodding and needles are poking
Doctors and nurses are keeping you here
Suddenly Congress is there with an order
The right wing breeds more hate and fear
Machines do your breathing, you can't on your own
Your kidney shut down long ago
Your heart never beats machines do that too
You're not gone
CHORUS
Repeat CHORUS and fade
IRAQI FIELDS FOREVER
Based on"Strawberry Fields Forever"
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New Lyrics by Jeff and Brandon
CHORUS
Let me drag you down
Where you're goin' to
Iraqi fields
Oil surreal
It's something we can fight about
Iraqi fields forever
Life ain't so easy after one-one
We live in fear of all we see
We're a democracy but we're getting it all wrong
We'll never let you disagree
CHORUS
Living is simple with blinds on
No massive weapons that you can see
We say we're going there to bring a tyrant down
What's gonna be is gonna be
CHORUS
Bechtel has fun with a war on
But Haliburton plays for free
The bodies pile high and I guess that it's kinda wrong
Don't really matter much to me
CHORUS
Fading instrumental overdubbed with clips and snippets of Bush speeches
WE ALL LIVE IN A NAZI LOONY BIN
Based on "Yellow Submarine"
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New Lyrics by Jeff and Brandon
In the town where George was born
No one told him what he should be
But he threw away his life
Smoking weed that was so green
So he prayed unto the Son
But he found the old Regime
And he ruled as if reborn
In a land that wasn't free
CHORUS:
We all live in a Nazi loony bin!
A Nazi loony bin!
A Nazi loony bin!
U.S.A. is a Nazi loony bin!
A Nazi loony bin!
A Nazi loony bin
And his friends are all adored
Only one of them, a m,ale wore
And the press begins to sing
[Opening bars of Deutschland Deutschland Uber Alles played by an out of tune German marching band, then directly into....]
CHORUS, leading directly into...
[Instrumental performance of the opening verse overdubbed with excerpts from a Nazi Party Rally, replete with Hitler bellowing and a crowd shouting "Sieg Heil! Seig Heil!" This is to be overdubbed with the sounds of Stuka's dive bombing, machine gun fire, and bombs exploding, leading directly back into....]
And the times are full of sleaze
While the Neocons do as they please
And he lives a life of ease
Killing young G.I.s can be a breeze
CHORUS
Repeat CHORUS and fade
TRANNY, YOU'RE A SWITCH, MA'AM
Based on"Baby You're A Rich Man"
by John Lennon and Paul McCartney
By the Coalition for a Republican-Free America
How would you like to be?
One of the feminine people?
Now that we know just what you are?
Who do you want to be?
Now that you're following a star
Acting so unnaturally
How would you like to be
One of the feminine people?
Preaching your hypocrisy
What do you want to say
Being the gal you hope to be
Hoping to find your way
CHORUS:
Tranny you're a switch ma'am
Coulter you're a bitch, ma'am
Were you once a butch man too?
You keep all your hormones on a bathroom shelf
All by yourself, all for yourself
Tranny you're a witch ma'am
Coulter you're a bitch ma'am
Were you once a butch man too?
Why are your hands too big
Why is your voice so deep?
Now that you've gone so far away
Half truth is your fine art
Telling us that you haven't changed
Taking the facts apart
CHORUS
Repeat CHORUS AND FADE
GOPIGGIES
Based on "Piggies
By George Harrison
New Lyrics by Jeff and Brandon
Have you seen the GOPiggies
Screwing up our rights?
All we see are GOPiggies
Making a new Reich
Have the Bill of Rights to fuck around with
Hear the Bible-thumping piggies
Tell us what to do
Are you tired of GOPiggies
Bitching me and you
Always have a group to spew their hate at
In the House with right wing backing
They pass laws that keep people down
Listen to the lines they're cracking
In their minds there's something lacking!
Watching all the GOPiggies
Messing up the world
Neocons and GOPiggies
Chaos in a swirl
Always find a way to spread their hatred
Based on "Norweigian Wood"
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New lyrics by Daniel and Brandon
I just found a God
Or should I say
Jesus found me
He taught me to prey
It's not too late
Isn't it great?
He told me to preach and he told me to bitch ev'ry where
I use the Good Book and it told me to hate but not share
Now I disdain blacks
Mexicans too
No love for Jews
And I spit on fags
Never ask why
Just let 'em die
Yes Jesus has changed me, The Lord God has shown me his work'
My friends have all left me they think I've become such a jerk.
What else can I do?
All things will pass
Kissing God's ass
So, I prey all day
Seething in hate
Isn't it great?
HERE TO STAY
Based on "Yesterday"
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New lyrics by Jeff and Brandon
Yesterday
George was wasted nearly ev'ry day
But the High Court said he's here to stay?
Oh George sure likes to get his way.
Ever more
In election year two thousand four
The Swifty Liars did a whole lot more
And threw away the votes galore
CHORUS:
How he came to win we're not sure, he will not say
George did something wrong, now the ass is here to stay
Suddenly
George ain't the Christian that he claimed to be
Praising policies of brute savagery
Oh George turned Reich wing suddenly
CHORUS
Ever more
Now they cozy up with male whores
Give the right wing press a whole lot more
To make him Fuhrer ever more
CAN BUY ME POWER
Based on "Can't Buy Me Love"
by John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New lyrics by Brandon
Can buy me power!
Oh Power
Can buy me power!
I'll buy a Congressman my friend
if it gets me what I need!
I'll pay a couple thousand bucks
I don't care if it looks like greed
Cause I sure do, love to count the money
Money can buy me power
I'll give you a little extra cash
If you give me tax cuts too
Youi know I got a lot to give
I'm so deeply into you
I sure do love to count the money
Money can buy me power
Can buy me power
Listen as I tell you so
Can buy me power
Yeah yeah yeah-yeah
Say you'll vote the way I tell you too
To keep me satisfied
Say you'll pass the kind of right wing bills
That cash can surely buy
I sure do love to count the money
Money can buy me power
Buy me power
Listen as I tell you so
Can buy me power
Yeah yeah yeah-yeah
Say you don't want no clean air too
I'll help you on the take
Say you don't want pure water too
More poisons in your lakes
I sure love to count the money
Money can buy me power
Can buy me power
Oh power
Bouy me power yeah!
WHEN I'M SIXTY-FIVE
(THE SOCIAL SECURITY DEFORM SONG)
Based on "When I'm Sixty-Four"
by John Lennon and Paul McCartney
by Jeff and Brandon
When I get older
Losing my home
Not too long from now
Will you still be sending a security check
Will the system be broken to heck?
If I'm broke with noting to eat
Would you give me jive
Would you still pay me?
Would you delay me?
When I'm sixty-five
You'll be broken tooo
And if you get smart now
Social can stay too.
I could go begging, hat in my hand
When the checks are gone
Maybe eat some cat food from the doggie dish
Hoping, praying, make a new wish
Lighting a candle, the power is off
Trying to stay alive
Will you still pay me?
Will you delay me?
When I'm sixty-five
Every winter we can beg a shelter from
the County Home if its not to near
Food stamps are all done
Thank you Necons
Scrimping on clothing
Dropping the meds
Feeling not too well
Indicate exactly what you mean to pay
Getting weary, passing away
Send me an answer,
Mail a form
While I'm still alive
Will you still pay me?
Will you delay me?
When I'm sixty-five?
LORD OF THE KILL
Based on "The Continuing Story ofBungalow Bill"
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New lyrics by Brandon and Danny
CHORUS
Hey, Lord of the Kill!
Did what you will
George of the Kill
Hey, Lord of the Kill
Did what you will,
George of the Kill
He went campaigning with a smirk, a lie, and Carl Rove
He broke the bottle and he prayed to God above
But found a gospel based on hate instead of love
Listen to the lies
CHORUS
He said he would unify he never would divide
And then we went to war with facts he could not hide
More people die each day, George takes it all in stride
Listen to the lies
CHORUS
He said we'd wage a war for weapons that weren't there
He said we'd fight this thing 'cause Hussein couldn't care
If it's for Freedom I wish he'd leave a little here!
Listen to the lies
CHORUS
Repeat CHORUS and fade
CHORUS
Repeat CHORUS and fade
GOD GAYS AND GUNS
(ALL YOU NEED IS GUNS)
Based on "All You Need is Love"
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New Lyrics by Daniel Gallagher
(Opening fanfare, opening bars of " Deutschland, Deutschland Uber Alles" on trumpets and brass, leading directly into....)
God! Gays! Guns!
God! Gays! Guns!
God! Gays! Guns!
Leaders as we know can all be bought
Take the cash and run but don't get caught
Bitch about the queers and say they're only so depraved
It's easy!
Hear the NRA and you'll be saved
Praise Our God and bitch about the gays
Hear the NRA and you'll forever go insane
It's easy!
CHORUS
All you need is God!
All you need is guns!
All you need is God, guns
Bitch about the gays
Thank the NRA you're so depraved
Thank the Sweet Lord God that you've been saved
It's fun to skirt the issues when you can hide behind three G's
It's easy!
All you need is God!
All you need is guns!
All you need is God, guns
Bitch about the gays
All you need is God!
All you need is guns!
All you need is God, Guns!
Bitch about the gays.
FADE OUT WITH
God is all you need
Guns are all you need,
God is all you need
Guns are all you need,
(We hate you Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
We hate you Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!)
God is all you need
Guns are all we need....
DONALD RUMFELD'S INNER GROVE
Based on Sergeant Pepper Inner Grove
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney
New lyrics by Brandon
We like like hell to get our way
We like like hell to get out way
we like like hell to get our way....
2 comments:
Funny, guys! Does my Beatle-loving heart proud. I like GOP Piggies, but Switch Man is my second.
Classic! Norwegian Wood happens to be my favourite Beatles track anyway but I like the parody just as much. *ahem* It's pray.... (pedant)
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